The Empire and its Prostitutes

 The BBC website carries a report on how sex workers in India had to undergo medical examinations by the British colonial authorities. 

As usual, the BBC’s reporting is belated. The Socialist Party were early critics of the Empire’s use of women to “service” the troops. 

And an article appeared on an Indian based progressive website based upon this blog post.

The Conscripted Prostitutes

During the days of Empire when Britain ruled India there were licensed brothels for the use of the occupation troops. Each regiment had at its disposal from twelve to fifteen native women, who dwelt in what were called “chaklas.” These women were allowed to consort with British soldiers only, and were registered with the local magistrate. If a woman tried to escape from the chakla, she would be punished with fine or imprisonment. In charge of the women was placed a superintendent or brothelkeeper, called the “mahaldarni.” She also was expected to procure women. “Ameer has supplied the 2nd Derby Regiment with prostitutes for the past three years, and I recommend her to any other regiment requiring her for a similar capacity.” -S. G. M., Quartermaster 2nd Derby Regiment.”

The price of the visits of soldiers to the chakla was fixed and was so low that the soldier would scarcely miss what he paid. When the soldiers were on the march, the women were carried in carts, with British soldiers to guard them.

Their sexual exploitation was justified by Colonel T. G. Crawley, commanding Allahabad District, describing the monetary compensation calculation: —

“It stands to reason that the women could not be in debt, for if a woman only received six men daily for twenty-three days in a month, at the rate of only four annas [about fourpence] per visit, that would represent thirty-four rupees eight annas, and even allowing one-fourth of this to go to the mahaldarni, rent two rupees, and food at the rate of four annas daily for thirty days, a woman would have fully seventeen rupees [a little more than one ]pound] a month clear.”

An 1886 military order, written by the Commander-in-Chief of the army in India (Lord Roberts) laid out the rules:

“In the regimental bazaars it is necessary to have a sufficient number of women, to take care that they are sufficiently attractive…”

His orders were carried out. The officer in command of the 2nd Battalion Cheshire Regiment sent the following application to the magistrate of Umballa Cantonment: “Requisition for extra attractive women for regimental bazaar, in accordance with Circular Memorandum 21a…Please send young and attractive women..” Another commanding officer writes: “There are not enough women; they are not attractive enough. More and younger women are required, and their houses should be improved.” Yet another commanding officer writes: “I have ordered the number of prostitutes to be increased to twelve, and have given special instructions as to the four additional women being young and of attractive appearance.” Another case cited was one commanding officer who issued orders to his quartermaster to arrange with the regimental Kutwal [an under-official, native] to take two policemen, and go into the villages and take from the homes of these poor people their daughters from fourteen years and upwards, about twelve or fifteen girls at a time. They were to select the best-looking. Next morning, these were all put in front of the Colonel and Quartermaster. The former made his selection of the number required. They were then presented with a pass or license, and then made over to the old woman in charge. The women already there, were then examined by the doctor, and found diseased, had their passes taken away from them, and were removed by the police and these fresh, innocent girls put in their places.

Innocent females were denounced as suspected prostitute and made to register to live among the soldiers. Corrupt police made large sums of money by threatening to thus hand over girls to the magistrate, and demanding bribes as the alternative of such a fate.

The above facts are taken from a missionaries book “The Queens Daughters in India”. Despite the Christian morality it espouses against the state-sponsored prostitution it does offer some other insights about the subjugation of India by the British Empire.

“Wages are so low in India as to constitute the native the virtual slave of the Anglo-Saxon.

By means of the pitiful wages paid for work, not one-half the comfort is provided by white masters to Indian servants that was secured to the black men in America, by the few of those owners of slaves who were really humane. The very fact that the slave was a rather scarce article and a good price paid for him in America, made it to the interest of his owner to look after his health and comfort to a certain extent. We are not defending slavery – it is an abomination in the sight of God, whether it exists under the disguise of abnormally low wages or shows itself openly; and slavery is always a greater moral curse to the master than to the oppressed. England virtually owns a whole nation of slaves in her control of India, and the effect of this fact upon the morals of that country will depend wholly upon whether she rules to redeem her subjects or to enrich herself. The worst feature of all in slavery is the appropriation of women by their masters. And this form of villainy is always excusing itself by slandering the oppressed women.”


Taxed because it is easier and cheaper

 Humphreys county in Mississippi has an unemployment rate double the national level. The local economy was already in a shambles when the coronavirus hit. But the pandemic has made things worse. Yet the county’s residents have been targeted by the IRS for claiming a tax credit that aims to lift working parents out of poverty.

Joe Jackson, the mayor of Belzoni, said, “Most people around here are kind of adjusted to the idea that the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. That’s not surprising to people in our area.” 

The Internal Revenue Service audits Humphreys county taxpayers at a higher rate than anywhere else in America that’s about 12 out of 1,000 tax returns are audited each year in the county. That’s 53% higher than the national average and raises the question of why such a place is the subject of such IRS attention. Why not the haunts of millionaires and billionaires, like Manhattan?

The IRS audits about 300,000 taxpayers who claim the earned income tax credit, or EITC, each year. These taxpayers are targeted more often than high-income and high-wealth taxpayers because the audits of EITC claimants are easier to do, according to a 2019 letter written by the IRS Commissioner. The IRS’s policy has resulted in higher rates of tax audits in poor communities of color than the rest of the country. Eight of the most heavily audited counties in the country are in Mississippi. In Humphreys county, 76% of the 8,000 residents are Black.

The IRS audits most EITC claimants by mail, but wealthy taxpayers are typically audited in person and the audits require more training. In the 2019 fiscal year, about 80% of individual taxpayer audits were done by mail. But 52% of the $6.9bn recovered from these tax audits came from audits done in person, which are typically performed on wealthier taxpayers. 

The IRS commissioner, Charles Rettig, wrote that the IRS needs more money to hire and train auditors in order to balance the number of audits across all income levels. Between 2010 and 2017, the IRS budget was cut by about $2bn. The budget cuts shifted the focus of IRS audits from high-income taxpayers to low- and middle-income EITC claimants.

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2020/oct/18/tax-audit-earned-income-tax-credit-mississippi

Science or Right-wing Libertarianism?

  The “Great Barrington declaration” on the COVID-19 pandemic has called for an immediate resumption of “life as normal” for everyone but the “vulnerable”, fuelled these notions by casting doubt on the utility of lockdown restrictions. “We know that all populations will eventually reach herd immunity”, it stated. The declaration’s core assumption is that population immunity will be achieved by allowing life to go on as normal and shielding only the most vulnerable from the virus.  The thrust of its argument is based on a false opposition between those who argue for lockdown and those who are against it, when in fact lockdowns are one of numerous measures that scientists have called for, and are seen as a short-term last resort to regain control. And shutting away the most vulnerable as life continues as normal is not only inhumane, but impossible: by this measure, the carers, household members and frequent close contacts of vulnerable people would also need to isolate. Moreover, young people with pre-existing conditions they don’t yet know about can be equally susceptible, and “long Covid”, with its debilitating host of symptoms, affects people of different ages.

The signing ceremony had been carefully orchestrated for media attention, with a slick website and video produced to accompany the event. Within hours of its launch, it had seeded political and ideological impact disproportionate with its scientific significance. Its three signatories were later  to be received by Alex Azar, the US secretary of health and human services, and by Scott Atlas, recently appointed as Donald Trump’s health adviser, who tweeted  that “top scientists all over the world are lining up with the @realDonaldTrump #Covid_19 policy”. And on a call convened by the White House, two senior officials in Trump’s administration cited the declaration. The trio of scientists who fronted the declaration were able to put the weight of the world’s most prestigious academic institutions behind their statements – Stanford, Harvard and Oxford – giving the declaration a sheen of respectability. The views of these scientists about lockdown and the pursuit of herd immunity are no doubt sincerely held (though, notably, not published in any peer-reviewed scientific articles)

When scientists disagree, we expect them to provide evidence for their position. Yet the declaration’s many contentious statements are unreferenced – and the manner of its launch seems designed to amplify publicity over substance. If anything, the tactics employed in this performance have serious implications for the public’s trust in scientists.

The truth is that a strategy of pursuing “herd immunity” is nothing more than a fringe view. There is no real scientific divide over this approach, because there is no science to justify its usage in the case of Covid-19.  The president of the UK’s Academy of Medical Sciences describes the declaration’s proposals as “unethical and simply not possible”. The science is clear: attaining herd immunity to coronavirus via uncontrolled infection is a fringe view, peddled by a minority with no evidence to back up their position. 

It is already clear that the declaration is being used to legitimise a libertarian agenda. It was a piece of political theatre. Indeed, some authors have questioned if it was ever anything about health, or whether its motivations were always purely economic; as the professor of political economy Richard Murphy put it, the declaration was “the economics of neoliberalism running riot … revealing in the process its utter indifference to the interests of anyone but those who can ‘add value’ within that system”.  

The American Institute for Economic Research (AIER), where the declaration was signed, is a libertarian thinktank that is, in its own words, committed to “pure freedom” and wishes to see the “role of government … sharply confined”. The institute has a history of funding controversial research – such as a study extolling the benefits of sweatshops supplying multinationals for those employed in them – while its statements on climate change largely downplay the threats of the environmental crisis. It is a partner in the Atlas network of thinktanks, which acts as an umbrella for free-market and libertarian institutions, whose funders have included tobacco firmsExxonMobil and the Koch brothers. Rightwing free-market foundations and institutions have long attempted to savage the public reputation of well-intentioned policies such as those aimed at curbing ecological threats and limiting smoking.

We see at play in the Great Barrington declaration: discredit the scientific consensus, spread confusion about what the right response is and sow the seeds of doubt. It seems that lockdown restrictions aimed at bringing the virus under control are merely the latest target in this rightwing stealth campaign.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/oct/18/covid-herd-immunity-funding-bad-science-anti-lockdown

No-one for President


 Capitalist politicians have only one way of dealing with a crisis: off-loading their burden on to the backs of working people. Why should any working person vote for any of the candidates in November? It is a choice between Al Capone and Bugsy Siegel, the Italian Mafia or the Colombian Cartel?


Peace, freedom and equality are what every ordinary American, black, brown and white, wishes for and needs. The liberation of mankind is the socialist’s task. The World Socialist Party has sometimes been accused of seeking to overthrow the American government using violence. When we are accused of this, our critics are implying that we want to abolish capitalism with minority support, that we want to impose the will of the minority upon the majority. The opposite is the truth. We believe we need to win a majority of the people to support a change in the system. Many people have a stereotyped picture of what a revolution is like. They say a revolution is barricades and insurrection in a armed take-over. It isn’t.


The Democratic and Republican Parties are owned by the capitalist class and stand for the interests of the capitalist class. The two-party electoral system masquerades as democracy in action. We have never really had a chance to democratically vote to change the nature of this capitalist system. Politicians are the goons for the corporations, Wall Street’s bought and paid for professional liars. We know we can be fooled by good actors and it is no coincidence that one president was ex-Hollywood and another ex-reality TV. Money buys power and influence. Think-tanks determine policy proposals. Lobbyists draft the legislation. All to profit the elite few, to protect the wealth and power inequalities, to divide and conquer any resistance. They ensure peripheral policies such as Confederate statues or mixed-gender restrooms take center-stage


To vote in this election is to prop up a corrupt criminal regime. Trump and Biden are perfect for King Capital.



They distract from the real issues confronting people and it allows the media to turn the political discourse into differences in temperament of their respective personalities. Trump and Biden are essentially puppets and figureheads of the real ruling classes; the billionaires, the corporations, and the investor class. The media insist you vote for the face and not the case. And the debate pivots around identity and gesture politics rather than a real anti-capitalist alternative. You take responsibility for your vote. Politicians promise a lot of things, but can any of them deliver? Never under capitalism is the answer. Any politician who sincerely and genuinely wanted to do good within the system is thwarted at every turn. The politician doesn’t change the system. The system changes the politician. After every election the poor get poorer and the rich richer. Politicians never deliver and always fail. Further, any agreement, any compromise, any concession can be undone and rolled back by the next administration.


About half of eligible voters won’t cast their ballot. So in every election the president is not wanted by the majority. People literally refuse to opt for either candidate for president. How can a system based on capitalism be democratic? It’s fundamentally impossible. Nor can one have political democracy without economic democracy.


Society can only progress and evolve with democratic control of the means of production. It’s that simple. All societies that use money have inequality. There are no examples of long lasting peaceful societies that use money. It’s an eventuality that wherever money is used, unnecessary suffering will be sure to follow. Money literally buys the earth in our system, and the people who possess the most money are holding the planet hostage. We are taking part in an election for people who think it is okay to own people and the planet.



The sad truth of the matter is that the vast majority of us are serfs pushed deeper and deeper into debt with various forms of rent that must be paid to landowners, utilities and food corporations. Our employment is to serve the parasitical and ravenous appetites of the rich who use all imaginable methods at their disposal to coerce and dominate us. The capitalist system is a demeaning and degrading master-slave system. On November 3, people will be deciding who holds the whip.

Life expectancy, morbidity, and the pandemic

  In 2019, life expectancy at birth in the UK was 82.9 years for a woman and 79.2 years for a man (the average for both was 81.1 years). These numbers look good, especially when compared with historical figures. In 1950, for example, the average life expectancy at birth for a UK citizen was 68.9 years. The combined effects of economic growth, better education and an improved NHS have delivered an extra 12 years of life. Impressive.

That is until you start comparing the UK with other European countries. When you do this, you find we have seen smaller increases in life expectancy than the western European average – 5.3 years compared with 5.7 years.

Spain and Italy, for example, both had an average life expectancy at birth of 83.1 years in 2019. In France, it was 82.9 years, Sweden 82.8 years and Germany 81.2. The western European average life expectancy was a whole one year longer than in the UK.

The average healthy life expectancy for the UK in 2019 was 68.9 years, meaning that people in the UK spend an average 12.2 years living with some kind of illness.  Britain has the worst healthy life expectancy of any other European country. We come bottom of the league table. We’ve seen a slower improvement in healthy life expectancy (3.6 years) than the western European average (5.8 years).

 And the situation for children is equally bad: the under-five mortality rate in the UK in 2019 was 4.1 deaths per 1,000 live births – one of the worst performances in western Europe, second only to Malta. 

Across the four nations. Scotland has the lowest life expectancy (79.1 years), followed by Northern Ireland (80.3 years), Wales (80.5 years), and England (81.4 years).

The major causes of Britain’s poor health are noncommunicable diseases such as diabetes, chronic respiratory disease and dementia. The Global Burden of Disease shows that deaths from alcohol and drug use have increased by 280% and 166% respectively over the past 30 years. And the health of our nation is not uniform across the country. There’s an eight-year difference in life expectancy between the north and the south of the UK. Life expectancy is highest in Richmond (84.5 years) and lowest in Blackpool (76.4 years) – worse than the average for China, Turkey, Thailand, Cuba, Chile, Jordan and even the US.

The lowest 10 expectancies in England skew towards the poorest places in the north-west and north-east of the country: Blackpool, Middlesbrough, Hull, Liverpool, Hartlepool, Rochdale, St Helens, Sunderland, Blackburn and Manchester. 

Is it a coincidence that the worst life expectancies in England track the upsurge in coronavirus?

The virus has exposed the inequalities that divide our society. It is deprived areas such as Bolton and Rochdale where infections have been endemic. It’s no accident that Liverpool, which scores high on the list of the UK’s most deprived places, was the first region to be classified as very high risk in Johnson’s recalibrated approach to Covid-19.

At the beginning of the pandemic, 1.5 million people in England were deemed at sufficiently high risk of coronavirus to require shielding. The unfortunate truth is that far more people in the UK are at risk than this number suggests. As work from University College London revealed earlier this year, when one includes those over 70 years of age, and those who are under 70 but live with chronic diseases such as diabetes or cancer, the actual number at risk in the UK is more than 8 million people.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/oct/18/alarming-data-britain-sick-man-europe-before-covid

Trump has no cure and Biden is no panacea

 



Do you own the wealth which you produce? No, you do not. Instead you hand it over to parasitical class. You are the fundamental power of society, and yet you don’t know it. You imagine that you are free, while in fact you are enslaved. You are dependent on your employer for a job. The bosses who own the means of production own your very life. The two parties, the Democratic and Republican parties, have brought the country to the verge of ruin but you still vote for them.

 

The Republicans and Democrats will, as usual, use the media to whip you into line. Needless to say, the worker has no choice between these two capitalist parties, that  are both pledged to the same system and that whether the one or the other succeeds, he or she will still remain a wageslave. The working class must get rid of the whole brood of masters and exploiters, and put themselves in possession and control of the means of production. It is therefore a question not of “reform,” the mask of fraud, but of revolution. The capitalist system must be overthrown, class-rule abolished and wage-slavery supplanted by the cooperative industry. We hear it frequently urged that the Democratic party is the “poor man’s party,” “the friend of labor.” There is but one way to relieve poverty and to free labor, and that is by making common property of the means of production.

 

Is the Democratic Party, which we are assured by those sympathizers of Sanders has “strong socialistic tendencies,” in favor of socialized ownership? Is it opposed to the wage-system, with its endless flood the poverty, misery and wretchedness. The difference between the Republican and Democratic parties involve no issue, no principle in which the working class have very much interest. Between these parties socialists have no choice, no preference. They are one in their opposition to socialism, that is to say, the emancipation of the working class from wage-slavery, and every worker who has intelligence enough to understand class interest and the nature of the struggle in which it is involved, will once and for all time sever our relations with them both.

 

Several Republican former senators and congressmen have endorsed Biden for president, saying that he is better qualified than Trump to run the country. There is also a large number of intelligence and foreign policy advisers, many who have worked for Republican presidents, also endorsed Biden. Colin Powell is such a person. Former ambassador, John Negroponte, is another one who endorsed Biden. It was Negroponte who funnelled covert funds from the CIA to the Contra rebels in Nicaragua; he was ambassador to the United Nations as the U.S.A. sought to go to war with lies about Iraqi WMD and then ambassador to Iraq during the U.S. occupation of that country. He was the director of national intelligence during Bush torture program. Nobody has ever accused Negroponte of being a progressive yet he is happy to publicly endorsed Biden. Why?

 

There is absolutely no difference between the Republican and the Democratic parties so far as the working class is concerned. They are exactly alike. They are both committed to the capitalist system. They are both committed to wage slavery, and whether the one or the other wins, you always lose. Your condition remains the same. You have tried these two capitalist parties over and over again, with the same inevitable result. The politicians who used you to vote to perpetuate the system in which you are slaves have no respect for you. They treat you with contempt. And you say “Oh, I have grown wise this year, I am going over to the Democratic Party, over to Biden and Harris.” No matter which of these parties is in power, workers remain in a state of slavery and their lives will be broken. If now and then there is one who escapes it is simply the exception which serves to prove the rule.

 

The World Socialist Party is the party of the present and the future. Waste your time and your energy no longer. The World Socialist Party is the only party that has a claim upon you. The World Socialist Party is pledged to abolish the capitalist system, class-rule and wage-slavery—a party which does not compromise or confuse, but, preserving inviolate its principles of political and economic freedom.

Time for World Socialism

  

A divided world has failed to rise to the challenge of fighting the COVID-19 pandemic, U.N. Secretary-General Antonio Guterres said. He explained that far more could have been done if countries had worked together to combat the disease, which has killed more than one million people.

“The COVID-19 pandemic is a major global challenge for the entire international community, for multilateralism and for me, as secretary-general of the United Nations. Unfortunately it is a test that, so far, the international community is failing.”

He said that if coordinated measures were not taken, “a microscopic virus could push millions of people into poverty and hunger, with devastating economic effects in the years to come”.

Guterres also criticised countries for a lack of unity in trying to solve other global challenges including the conflicts in Afghanistan, Yemen and Syria.

“It is a source of enormous frustration,” he said.

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-health-coronavirus-un/divided-world-is-failing-covid-19-test-says-frustrated-u-n-chief-idUSKBN2720JB?il=0

Slavery Victims Suffer More

  Of almost 4,700 confirmed foreign victims of trafficking,  Of these, 549 adults and just 28 children were granted discretionary leave to remain as trafficking victims, an immigration status that gives people a temporary right to stay in the UK if they have suffered extreme hardship over a four-year-period. For nearly three-quarters (74%) of all trafficking victims granted discretionary leave, the period lasted between seven months to a year. A further 7.8% were given even less, between zero and six months.

The figures have shocked anti-slavery campaigners. The data challenges the claim that Britain is a world leader in tackling modern slavery.

Scum rises to the top

 



According to an analysis by Swiss bank UBS and consulting firm PwC, billionaire wealth increased to $10.2 trillion through the end of July, setting a new record amid the coronavirus pandemic even as millions of unemployed people fall into poverty. The number of billionaires also rose from 2,158 in 2017 to 2,189 this summer, according to the report.

 Health care billionaires saw their wealth increase by 50%. Technology billionaires saw their wealth rise by 42.5%. Billionaires in the entertainment, financial services, materials, and real estate sectors saw increases of 10% or less. Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos has seen his wealth rise more than 60% during the pandemic to $195 billion through late August, according to the analysis. Tesla CEO Elon Musk saw his wealth more than triple to $85 billion over that time frame.

Some executives, like Zoom CEO Eric Yuan and Bezos, have profited from a boom in business caused by the lockdowns. Others have profited directly from government aid distributed to their companies. But most billionaires saw their wealth increase due to rising investments, buoyed by a stock market surge propped up by government assistance.

This is not the first time that billionaires profited while millions suffered. 

The Institute for Policy Studies found that the wealthiest 400 billionaires in the US not only recovered from the 2008 recession within three years but increased their wealth by 80% over the following decade. By comparison, the bottom 80% of earners have still not recovered.

 The lack of government action since the spring has resulted in an estimated 8 million Americans falling into poverty since May, according to a study from researchers at Columbia University. The lack of additional stimulus payments and the expiration of enhanced federal unemployment benefits has resulted in 6 million Americans falling into poverty over just the last three months, according to a study from researchers at the University of Chicago and Notre Dame.

The problem has been even worse globally. Between 88 million and 114 million people around the world have fallen into extreme poverty, defined as living on less than $1.90 per day, since the pandemic hit, according to the World Bank. There are now more than 700 million people living in extreme poverty and researchers expected that number to keep rising.

https://www.alternet.org/2020/10/billionaires-rich/

Old Mr. Capitalism ( Short Story)


A Short Story from the July 1977 issue of the Socialist Standard



Poor old Mr. Capitalism. He was in a very bad way indeed. Pains all over his body, from head to toe. He put on his hat and coat and decided yet again to see his doctor.


Poor old Mr. Capitalism. He could hardly walk, dragging his feet along as though each step were his last, and causing many a sympathetic eye to glance knowingly in his direction. After all, he had been around a very long time. Too long, he had heard some say—sometimes discreetly, sometimes openly for all to hear.


“Not you again, Mr. Capitalism,” the doctor shrieked, and rose from behind his desk to help the wheezing old man into a chair.


“I’m afraid so, doctor,” Mr. Capitalism sighed. “I’ve been having those same old pains again. All over me they are. I just can’t get rid of them.”


“Take a breath and tell me all about the,,” the doctor said. So poor old Mr. Capitalism gathered as much strength as he could muster and poured forth his troubles.


“Well, to start with,” he began, “I’ve got those Conservative pains in my  . . . you know, doctor . . . “


“Posteria?”


“Yes, that’s right. I’ve tried everything. Exercise, hot flannel, the lot, but they’re always there—as though they sort of like me the way I am, old and decrepit. It’s hard to explain really. All I can say is that they’re nothing but a pain in the  . . . the  . . . “


“Ar . . . posteria?”


“Yes, that’s right. Then there’s those Labour pains I get in my stomach. If I wasn’t a man I’d swear it was  . . .  They double me up at times. It’s a queer sensation. I get the feeling they’re trying to change my basic metabolism—you don’t mind me saying that, do you? trying to change the way i walk and things like that. Yet fundamentally they’re just the same as the Conservative pains in my  . . . my . . . “


“Go on,” urged the doctor impatiently, getting a little tired of the same old complaints. “What else is the matter with you?”


“Well there’s this other pain, the one in my neck. You called it the Liberal pain, I think. I get it when I’m undecided, you know, like when I can’t make up my mind. It’s as though it doesn’t quite know whether it wants to be a Conservative pain or a Labour one, if you can see what I’m driving at? Then there’s the same old CP ailment, those red rashes that keep appearing at odd places on the surface of my body.”


“You’ve been sleeping under the bed again, haven’t you?” the doctor said chastisingly. “What have I told you about the little bugs that dwell under mattresses and on bedroom carpets?”


“I know, doctor, but sometimes I get to thinking that perhaps if I sleep that way my other pains will disappear and I’ll only have to worry about the rashes.”


“Rubbish. I’ve told you before that they’re really no different, and will give you exactly the same suffering.”


“I know,” old Mr. Capitalism acceded with a groan. “But I’ve tried everything else, haven’t I? I took those reform pills you gave me but the relief only lasted for a very short while. It hardly seemed worthwhile taking them. Then there was the anti-inflation medicine and the wage-policy drug. Even the TUC capsules didn’t make a scrap of difference. I don’t know what’s going to become of me, doctor. What kind of future has a man in my position got to look forward to?”


He left, and the doctor shook his head. “Poor old fellow, he’s not long for this world.” He rang the bell and asked: “Where’s my next patient, nurse?” 


“There aren’t any,” she said.


“No patients! Nobody ill! What’s happened?” said the doctor.


“A new crowd moved into the neighbourhood today”, said the nurse. “They say they don’t need any pills or potions, and they’ve got a big van waiting to—”she whispered in his ear.


“Bury Mr. Capitalism! He’s not dead yet.”


“As good as,” said the nurse.” I’m thinking of helping them actually. They’re re-naming their house ‘Socialism’.”


“I’ll come with you,” said the doctor. “Old Mr. Capitalism was as much as I could stand.”


Paul Breeze